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I Have A Problem...

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1 I Have A Problem... on Tue Oct 05, 2010 8:57 pm

I Figured I would just try tackling it with me and the boys (Tay Noobz) .. But I do know that a lot of you're more experienced and might already be able to help so I'll take any advice.. anything really helps.

My Major Problem.. (You might point out more than just this one lol) I break under pressure.. its kinda like stage fright... When i'm being watched i get shaky and nervous and i was just wondering if anybody might be able to.. help me concentrate or Focus on calming down..

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2 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 06, 2010 2:18 am

With time, things will get easier. No worries man, we were all there at some point.

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3 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 06, 2010 9:34 am

yeah but... i hate seeing disappointment in their eyes.. like it kills me inside.

I suppose it'll get easier over time but i just hate thinking about it, its hard not to.

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4 Re: I Have A Problem... on Fri Oct 08, 2010 12:25 pm

I mean. tino's right it passes with time and it's sorta unavoidable.
but there's one thing that actually sorta helps. before u fight or even before u go to practice try envisioning the perfect kill. not saying it's gonna happen xD
but it makes u fight with a different attitude. i dont rly have stage fright but there are times where i lose focus and freeze >.> specially earlier on.

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5 Re: I Have A Problem... on Fri Oct 08, 2010 2:53 pm

(from: http://www.uncommonhelp.me/articles/overcome-performance-anxiety/ )

The art of travelling light

Performance anxiety gets in the way of performance because it clutters the mind just when your consciousness needs to be clear and ‘light’. Too much baggage slows you down and hampers performance. Even thoughts of performance are too ‘heavy’. To clear that bar, I had to be light. Not just physically, but psychologically. Too much

* Fear
* Hope
* Self-consciousness
* Desire to succeed

all weigh you down and stop performance.
‘Positive thinking’ - the will to succeed - of course needs to be there before you begin your activity, but also needs to be gently put aside whilst you actually perform. Less becomes more in the moment.

There are of course different kinds of performance. And what is good prep for one type of activity, such as testosterone-boosting chest-beating and stamping before attempting a world record weight lifting attempt, wouldn’t be so good for, say, preparing to walk a tightrope over the Grand Canyon or checkmate your chess opponent. So we need ‘lightness’ of mind which includes less concern with the future focuses of success and failure than with immediate awareness.

But what of performance anxiety specifically? After all, anxiety weighs you down much more than, say, optimism or self-belief.

How performance anxiety drives out performance


Let’s look at sports: The ability to deal with anxiety is integral to success. When we become really anxious, it gets harder to make subtle or minimal movements (try doing up your zipper with chronically shaking hands). Anxiety stops us thinking clearly, which is why panic makes people feel confused. Also, what we are anxious about will impact performance.

If you are anxious about how you are coming across when public speaking, you may focus more on that concern than on what you are actually saying. Of course that will damage performance. Being in the moment and just enjoying a sexual encounter as it unfolds is a world away from worrying that you’re ‘doing it right’. Sex is not something you do to someone, but an experience you have with them. Watching a movie whilst wondering how much it cost to make, how many people auditioned for the roles, where the scenes were shot, and so on gets in the way of just enjoying the movie. Again, sometimes less is more.

So what can you actually do to keep performance anxiety from stopping you doing what you want in the best possible way?

Tip 1: Prepare your mind

Before a sporting event (or any event where you feel performance anxiety is an issue), you should prepare. If you have done enough positive mental rehearsal beforehand, then you’ll feel naturally comfortable and ‘in the zone’ when the situation comes around.

Decide how you want to feel and at what point you want to start feeling like that. For example, I might have decided before my high jump contest that I wanted to feel calm but energized and totally focussed away from distractions. I might have wanted to start feeling this way during registration before the jumps and feel this more intensely as each jump approached.

Next imagine how it feels to feel like that - just for a few seconds. Then close your eyes and as you breathe relaxation around your body, visualize yourself looking the way you want to be in that situation, then doing whatever it is looking just the way you want to be. Now ‘drift into’ that image of you and notice being totally calm yet focussed in the situation itself.

The more you do this, the more probable it becomes that you’ll just naturally feel the optimum performance state when the situation comes around.


Tip 2: Remember to breathe

Yes, I too studied biology at school and know that breathing is pretty important 24/7! But you’d be amazed how many people hold their breath for longer than is actually helpful to them when they become anxious (holding your breath for a few seconds can actually help you stop hyperventilating during a panic attack). People will also start breathing in whilst forgetting to breathe out, which is a fast track to more anxiety (if you were looking for a quick way to get anxious!). So if you do find yourself starting to feel anxious - and remember this is much less likely to happen if you’ve done your prep - then simply focus on slowly breathing out a few times and you’ll be amazed how fast you calm down again.

Tip 3: Always seek to do your very best


The mark of a professional attitude is to always try your best, whether you’re playing tennis down the park or in the Wimbledon final; whether you’re presenting to a group of five or five hundred. This not only means you’ll improve your general performance as excellence starts to become the norm, but you’ll have less of the: “Oh my, this is really important! I have to perform my best ever!”

Tip 4: Consciously get some perspective

Whenever I’m ‘put on the spot’ and find myself, for example, treating an intensely phobic person in front of many other people on a workshop, that little voice in my head might try to tell me: “Hey, what if this doesn’t work? You’ll look a real idiot!” If that happens, I remind myself that:

* I’ve done this successfully hundreds of times.
* It’s more important that this person gets the help they need - my feelings can butt out.
* This is a tiny part of what is happening in the world, much of which is actually far more important. Evaluate the situation and ask yourself: How important is the event in the context of the entire world? How much will it matter in one hundred years?

Tip 5: Be a team player


Remember the onus isn’t all on you. If I am helping someone overcome a phobia, they need to work with me. The people watching need to be quiet. We are all in this together - it’s not just me. Whatever you do, other people will still play a part somehow. Don’t shoulder all of the responsibility all of the time.

And remember that ‘to err is human’. We all make mistakes; being able to understand that in ourselves and others makes us all more human and humane.

I can totally vouch for the "remember to breathe" one. I have a big problem when I get excited and anxious sometimes I just inhale and hold my breath for way too long, and don't notice it until I get a bit dizzy and I feel my head pounding.

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6 Re: I Have A Problem... on Fri Oct 08, 2010 7:09 pm

yeah, read that. i do a lot of that stuff subconsciously most of the time. just for a few seconds. Then close your eyes and as you breathe relaxation around your body, visualize yourself looking the way you want to be in that situation, then doing whatever it is looking just the way you want to be. Now ‘drift into’ that image of you and notice being totally calm yet focussed in the situation itself. this really helps me too.

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7 Re: I Have A Problem... on Fri Oct 08, 2010 8:41 pm

Thanks Everybody, I'll just have to practice and keep this up and see if it works! =]

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8 Re: I Have A Problem... on Fri Oct 08, 2010 10:57 pm

I'm really glad you brought this up canadian ..here in Satsu we are a really tight-knit family. We go through thick and thin together, lovers quarrels, personal battles and great celebrations alike. It is VERY very important to us that everyone keep themselves in top condition physically, mentally AND spiritually!

Personally - Always try to better yourself, keep moving forward day by day. I do not joke when I say this is a difficult task but: don't worry about things in the past which cannot be changed. It may or may not have been your fault, but whatever happened is over and done with and must be dealt with as it is now. Just do better the next time. You probably won't get it right the first few tries, what can I say, we can't all be Jesus.

Your family will always be here for you if you need someone to lean on - and we will surely be right behind you when confrontation arises against you.

Eat healthy. At least take a daily multivitamin (super-multi from a vitamin store not one of these pussy 100%DailyValue generic BS), and Omega3's.

Physically.. Don't let your body jedi mind trick you into being a big lazy Snorlax. At least 3 times a week get off your butt and do something for 30 minutes. I go rollerblading with my dogs, horseback riding, grocery shopping (lul)...

Spiritually, is totally up to you, of course. I will say however, it is proven to be healthier in the long run to have an optimistic point of view, and be open minded to new ideas, trying new things - with prior research first - look up buttsex if you are into it don't just surprise your girlfriend one night - not every girl is into that type of stuff!

Speaking of being off topic.. I'm done boring the thread with my overly-safe ramblings. Hope it makes sense.. and I apologize ahead of time if it doesn't!
me time

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9 Re: I Have A Problem... on Fri Oct 08, 2010 11:30 pm

O.O whoa.... my mind was blown.

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10 Re: I Have A Problem... on Mon Oct 11, 2010 10:56 am

Mistah Buraindo here to toss some wisdom. What you mistake for disappointment is just what everyone sees you can be. I had the same issue. They beat the idea of Satsu into me. Satsu members are there to help you be better with everything. It took me two tackle Ki's from Hector to realize he doesn't hate me. And shit, I've been through so much with all these people I consider family that I know they are only disappointed if the bring actual shame to the clan. Don't worry about the pressure dude, it gets better and easier. You'll be a great fighter in no time, I can assure you of this. Ask ANYONE who is the empire. They were ALL nervous at one point, some found ways around it easier than others.
You just gotta find what you're good at, ignore all eyes except for those of your opponent, and then harness all your skills. Shit, I still get scared/nervous when I fight Zaya. But I ignore that once the fight starts. It's all mind over matter. Forsrs.

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11 Re: I Have A Problem... on Mon Oct 11, 2010 7:14 pm

Mmm... Thanks, It does feel like things just keep getting better and better over time and time again whether it be before, during or after the weekend.

I have to say I'm really enjoying myself and i couldn't be happier. (Till I'm Initiated that is.. lol)

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12 Re: I Have A Problem... on Sun Oct 17, 2010 8:05 pm

You are a liar. I saw very little hesitance in the bearpit today.

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13 Re: I Have A Problem... on Mon Oct 18, 2010 6:52 am

What!? You Haven't seen me in the past.. Sunday was... Sunday was just amazing I Know.. I've gotten better and I'm happy for myself and glad other people think i kicked some ass! XD

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14 Re: I Have A Problem... on Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:35 pm

Well from what I have seen, you lie. :l

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15 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 20, 2010 10:41 am

Tch* .. Trying to make me feel all bad so i don't do as well next time...

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16 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:40 am

He's trying to undermine your shinobi mind tricks - don't listen! Keep playing like you're a bad fighter!

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17 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 20, 2010 8:29 pm

He's just jealous...

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18 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 20, 2010 10:53 pm

silence human!

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19 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:21 pm

Kinyama Haruto wrote:silence human!

Which makes you a what exactly?

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20 Re: I Have A Problem... on Wed Oct 20, 2010 11:47 pm

Akaryuu Kotaka wrote:
Kinyama Haruto wrote:silence human!

Which makes you a what exactly?
my imp.

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21 Re: I Have A Problem... on Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:36 am

not an imp... just something not human

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22 Re: I Have A Problem... on Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:40 am

silence imp!

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23 Re: I Have A Problem... on Thu Oct 21, 2010 4:04 pm

And this is why the title of the thread is "I have a problem" lolol~

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24 Re: I Have A Problem... on Thu Oct 21, 2010 5:15 pm

He's an InShawn. I spawned him from my grotesque mangina and sold him to Tino for a nickel.

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25 Re: I Have A Problem... on Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:54 pm

a nickel and a piece of lint. i miss that lint...

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